As my work shift was ending yesterday I was approached by Melissa from reception who had a young woman with her. My gut instinct was 'what did I do?' as the conversation looked somewhat intense. I couldn't have been more incorrect in my assumption because this young woman wanted to ask me if she could interview me. Again, my initial thought was 'cool, i'll be in a newspaper, quoted in english.' I couldn't have been more incorrect. The young woman explained to me that she was here with a camera crew and were looking to interview a gringa inquiring about what I think regarding Peruvian men. Oh geez! Welp I am not fluent in Spanish. Turns out it doesn't matter. So my bar manager Rob gave me an encouraging push to go for it- so I said okay! Melissa asked that I wear a shirt from The Point for publicity so I went to change and the nerves started kicking in! My thoughts were as follows: 'What the hell am I getting myself into? What if my Spanish is so terrible and no one can understand my answers? What if I am too truthful and I offend the Peruvian male population? What if I make a complete fool of myself?' I concluded that I only live once and to just go for it! I joined the young woman and her staff outside on our patio where 10 guests from the hostel were gathered to watch. I minimally briefed and the magic began! This was more or less our comical transcript, in Spanish of course!
"What do you think of Peruvian men?"
L"Peruvian men are handsome and they have nice, tan skin and they know what they want and what I want"
"Peruvian men know what they want and what you want?"
L"Peruvian men think they know what I want but not always."
"What is it that they think you want?"
L"They think that I want lots of kisses, but I don't!"
"You don't like kisses?"
L"Sometimes"
"What part of their body do you like?"
L"Their eyes!"
"What about their eyes?"
L"The color, and i also like their shoulders! They're strong, like yours" (I said to the man interviewing me- he was clearly not Peruvian as he had blonde hair and blue eyes)
"Have you have food prepared in a kitchen by a Peruvian man?"
L"It doesn't matter to me, I like all Peruvian food"
"Do you think Peruvian men can cook?"
L"Yes, I have a Peruvian friend who can cook very well- Hi Freddy!" (haha I love giving shout-outs!)
"Do you think Peruvian men have big feet?"
L"No, they're normal"
"Do you think Peruvians have good butts?"
L"Si, especially when they dance!"
"Do you dance with Peruvians?"
L"Sometimes"
"Will you dance a little bit with me?" (then we proceeded to dance together!)
Then I was asked to do a little dance by myself! hahahahaa
That concluded my interview and it will air on Lima Limon with Gringo Karl next Thursday at 12pm and 4pm. Unfortunately I don't think anyone in the states will be able to watch it unless you youtube it, but luckily a guest at the hostel, Fabio (who by the way had never heard of THE Fabio, gasp!) recorded the entire thing on his digital camera so he let me put it on my computer. I have video evidence of this silly interview. Oy vey. So after my interview and autograph signing I tried to take a brief snooze before Astrid's arrival and our departure for the disco. I failed miserably. I was just too hyped from becoming famous that I decided to have a coffee instead. Astrid got here around 10 and we spent the evening chatting with my friends, drinking cocktails, and challenging various handsome boys in foosball. At 1:30am Edwin, our disco-gatherer told us to get ready to go to the club and Astrid and I being the gorgeous, friendly women we are were offered a ride from Diego, the professional futbol player, Rodrigo the jaw-droppingly handsome musician, Jimmy the Argentinian, and Alonso- Rodrigo's cousin, in their macho sporty cars. On our way we were pulled over by the police. My heart dropped and all I could hear was Franny telling me not to get locked up abroad. I had been drinking, the driver had not, but I was still concerned that I was in trouble. While Rodrigo stepped out of the car to talk to the police, Alonso explained to me that Peruvian police are very corrupt and often times will threaten to arrest someone unless a bribe is offered. How unfortunate! So now I'm thinking i'll have to empty my pockets of the 30 soles spread amongst the various compartments in my jeans. Rodrigo and Diego worked their magic and we drove off just fine and continued on our way to the club. The disco that we go to on Thursdays is called Help and it holds just under 1000 people. The live band and countless drunkards dancing freely sure is a sight and rather entertaining. Astrid and I danced the night away, hopped in a cab at 3am with 2 other hostel-stayers and caught some shut eye.
